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Chapter Twenty-Two

The Sermon On The Mount

We awakened the next morning with sunlight streaming through the roof, hearing Jesus coaxing us to get up, wash, and eat our morning meal. Over and over again, he chanted cheerily, “The harvest awaits! The harvest awaits!” We knew today that things would change. Gone were the small crowds and towns were the harvest was bleak. This was Capernaum. A great multitude from towns in Galilee, Judea, Decapolis, and Perea waited in the nearby hills. We knew now that Jesus wasn’t merely an itinerant preacher, rabbi, or prophet. The almost full realization of who he was in the past few days made us realize the dangers but also the wonders lying ahead. Jesus, loved by many, was a marked man. Temple agents, magistrates, and the great majority of Pharisees, scribes, and rabbis would come at him with increasing force. Yet we were bolstered by Jesus’ courage as much as his miracles and words. Trapped by our fascination and love for him, we had left our previous lives forever. There was no turning back. We were on the precipice of something mind boggling—a brand new conception of the godhood not written in the Torah or spoken by the prophets. Each day that we had been with Jesus, we saw just a little more of his divinity. The words that he spoke, which came from the lips of God, became ingrained in our mind, until they became our words. We were, however, on the subject of his divinity, no better than infants in our comprehension. James, with all his knowledge of the law and history of our people, couldn’t explain what he felt. The more worldly Matthew, Judas, and myself, should have better insight, as should Simon, who had once been a temple spy. But the world had never seen the likes of Jesus. Doubting Thomas, after all his many questions, and Peter, who had drawn closer than anyone to Jesus, didn’t have a clue.

This morning, as the rays of the sun fell on Jesus head, a halo of light shimmered on his brown hair. His blue eyes blazed too brightly for a mortal man. That moment, as I rose to my feet, I could accept him as an angel or, reflecting upon my travels with Roman, Greek, and Egyptian pagans, a demigod or some sort, but I couldn’t have imagined my own brother as a manifestation of God. None of us could have understood this, least of all James, who, because of his teaching as a scribe, had to cast away most of what he had been taught. Everyone, however, including Peter’s family and Mary Magdalene, agreed on one thing this morning: Jesus was the Messiah, the Anointed One spoken of by John.

******

As soon as Jesus, his disciples, Esther, Dinah, Bernice, Mary, and Tobin emerged from the house, we were mobbed by people, which Peter and Andrew angrily shooed away. There were a few hecklers, but nothing like last night. Simon reminded us about supplicants who were really wolves in sheep’s clothing: temple agents, like Uzziah and his men, some of whom were scribes or priests. Simon, after all, had been a spy, himself. Peter, who had become Jesus’ chief protector, wouldn’t allow anyone to get close enough to do him harm. Andrew, Philip, John, and his brother James, quickly surrounded him as we exited, elbowing us away, as if they had claims to Jesus now. This would be the pattern from this day forward. It had been a compulsive action for the fishermen, but it was deeply resented by Matthew, Simon, Thomas, James, and me. With the addition of Judas, we outnumbered them, and James and I were his brothers. We especially shouldn’t be considered outsiders. Yet suddenly, with Jesus’ apparent approval, we were shoved aside by those men. Bartholomew, on the other hand, was philosophical about it. After a misspent life, he had changed his name and found new meaning for his life. He felt he was lucky just to be here. As resentful as James and I, though, were Matthew, Simon, and Thomas, who had never really fit into the group. Unfazed by this apparent discrepancy, were Peter’s family as well as Mary, satisfied just to tag along. Judas, still hard to define, seemed unconcerned about this issue, especially with Mary and Bernice in our midst. While we grumbled amongst ourselves, Bartholomew, his newfound friend Tobin in tow, had, like Judas and the women, a cheerful disposition. The mule and his cart couldn’t navigate the bumpy trail, so Bartholomew and Tobin were forced to walk. Yet both men huffed and puffed, laboring for each breath, stabbing the earth with their canes, refusing to be left behind.

Jesus led us to the hills near Capernaum, inside the protective ring, which seemed like overkill, but appeared to have special meaning. From the beginning, the fishermen had thought of themselves as special, the true inner circle. Now they fancied themselves as Jesus’ protectors. But we were in no danger now. Men and women with happy looks, as will as foolish children, strode and scampered on each side of us. The occasional harsh look flashed at us, as we first began our trek, had nearly vanished. Through a friendly corridor of expectant faces we ambled. When we reached a spot on the top of the tallest hill, our antagonism for the fishermen likewise vanished. Jesus was about to give the greatest sermon of his life.

As we sat around him, others gathered from the waiting multitude, those who were the swiftest getting the closest spots on the slopes. The fishermen sat right below Jesus. The remainder of the disciples shared proximity with Peter’s family and Tobin. By sheer chance or divine providence, I wound up beside Mary. This time, however, I tried clearing out my foolish thoughts. Standing up and looking around at the people strewn thickly below on the hills, Jesus said in the most clarion voice:

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

“Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.”

“Do not think that I came to destroy the Law or the Prophets. I didn’t come to destroy but to fulfill. For assuredly, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, one jot or one tittle will by no means pass from the law until all is fulfilled. Whoever therefore breaks one of the least of these commandments, and teaches men so, shall be called least in the kingdom of heaven; but whoever teaches them righteousness shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I say to you, that unless your righteousness exceeds the righteousness of the scribes and the Pharisees, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.”

“Remember the Commandments of the Lord,” Jesus spoke in a reverential tone. “Take heed that you understand what they mean. It is said, ‘You shall not murder,’ and whoever murders will be in danger of judgment. But I say to you that whoever thinks murderous thoughts has committed murder in his heart. An angry spirit is often a murderous spirit. Whoever is angry with his brother, sister or neighbor, showing contempt or hatefulness without cause, shall be in danger of breaking this commandment and may suffer hell fire. Therefore when you bring your gift to the altar but remember that someone has a grudge against you, first find your enemy, and be reconciled with that person before offering your gift. Agree with your adversary quickly, in case your adversary deliver you to the judge, the judge hand you over to the officer, and you are thrown into prison. For there you must pay the price!”

“You have also heard it said.” He raised a finger. “‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you, if man looks at a woman or a woman looks at a man with lust, they have already committed adultery in their heart. Furthermore, they tell us, ‘Whoever divorces his wife or husband, let them provide a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you, ‘whoever divorces for any reason except sexual immorality causes his wife or husband to commit adultery; and whoever marries someone who’s divorced commits the same offense.

“If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you, and if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you. It is more profitable for you that one of your members perish than for your whole body to be cast into hell.

“It was written, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform your oaths to the Lord.’ But I say to you, don’t swear at all: neither by heaven, which is God’s throne or by the earth, which is His footstool nor by Jerusalem, which is the city of David. Nor shall you swear by your head, because you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your Yes be Yes, and your No, No. Anything more than this is from Satan, not the Lord.

“It was also written, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I tell you not to resist an evil person. Whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other cheek to them. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let that person have your cloak too. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with that person two. Give to those who asks you. From those who want to borrow from you, don’t turn them away.

“Now we come to a great commandment.” Jesus looked back at his disciples. “It’s thought proper that you love your neighbor and hate your enemy, but that’s not in the Law or the Prophets nor shall it be now. I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes the sun rise on the evil just as He does on the good, and sends rain on the unjust as well as the just. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do this also? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors no do the same? You shall be perfect, just as your Father is perfect in heaven.

“Take heed that you don’t do charitable deeds before men, to be seen by them. Otherwise you have no reward from your Father in heaven. When you do a charitable deed, do not sound a trumpet before you as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory from men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. When you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand’s doing, that your charitable deed may be in secret. Your Father, who sees in secret, will Himself reward you openly.

“When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the corners of the streets, that they may be seen by men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. When you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in this secret place. Your Father, who sees in secret, will reward you openly. And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen does. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. Your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him. In this manner, therefore, remember this prayer:

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. They will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.”

“…. Remember this,” Jesus said, letting the prayer sink in, “if you forgive those of their trespasses, your heavenly Father will forgive you, but if you don’t forgive men their trespasses, your Father won’t forgive you. Moreover, when you fast, don’t be like the hypocrites, with a sad countenance. For they disfigure their faces that they may appear to men to be fasting. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. When you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, but do it privately, not publicly in order to be seen fasting. Do this for your Father in a secret place and He will reward you openly.”

“Remember this too,” he added solemnly. “Life is brief; heaven is everlasting. Don’t lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. Where your treasure is, there will be your heart, so choose spiritual things that last forever!”

“The lamp of the body is the eye.” He pointed demonstratively. “If your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. Therefore, if the light that is in you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of them. Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not clothe you that much more. Oh you of little faith? Don’t ask, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For after all these things the Gentiles seek. Your heavenly Father knows you need these things. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and these things shall be given to you. Don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”

Looking out with a stern eye, he raised a finger again. “Judge not, that you be not judged. From what judgment you give, you, too, will be judged and with what measure you use, it will be measured back to you. Why do you look at the speck in your someone’s eye and not consider the plank in your own eye? How can you say to someone, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’, when there is a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck out of someone else’s eye!”

With some bitterness in his voice, he said for the benefit of his critics: “Do not give what is holy to the dogs nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn and tear you in pieces.” Then, changing the tone entirely, he smiled and raised his arms wide. “The Lord is gracious in his mercy,” he cried. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find. Knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. What man or woman is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him? Therefore, do unto others as you would have them do unto you, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

“Enter by the narrow gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, there are few who find it. Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thorn bushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. Every tree that doesn’t bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. By their fruits you will know them. Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ And then I will say to them, ‘I knew you not; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’

“Whoever hears these sayings of mine, and follows them, is a wise man who built his house on rock. The rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, and it did not fall, for it was founded on rock. Now everyone who hears these sayings of mine and does not follow them, will be a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house and it fell. And great was its fall!”

******

When Jesus was finished, the people appeared spellbound. Raising two fingers and his thumb, as he had done many times before, as if blessing his audience, he signaled by this and his silence, the end of his sermon. I’ve never heard such stillness in so great a multitude. He hadn’t merely preached this time. He had given them a sermon in which he not only laid out the formula for salvation but added new commandments for their daily lives. Although he avoided attacking the temple, priesthood, Pharisees, and scribes, he condemned all hypocrites who tried winning salvation by outward signs such as praying in public and making a show of ritual in place of inward grace. Matthew managed to remember most of what Jesus said and write it down. Many of the disciples, however, in writing Jesus life and mission long after the events that occurred, left out details. Though the basic elements are there, often the original words of Jesus depend upon fading memories and are clouded by the prejudice of the writer. One of my gifts recognized by Jesus in our youth was my memory, which allowed me to fill in some of the gaps. What I recall now is similar to Matthew’s account, but is somewhat more accurate and not tainted by the male prejudice against women, seen in the treatment of Mary of Magdalene and other women. The constant reference to ‘him,’ for everyone, even though there were as many women in our audiences as men, was used by all the apostles, even Paul, but Jesus referred to both men and women or remained neutral, using words such as person or people.

Aside from the sayings themselves which were something a great preacher like Jesus would utter, portions of his sermon were rebukes against the doctors of the law. Clearly to me, for example, when he talked of praying in a secret place and bragging about the great things done for the Lord, he was referring to these puffed up and arrogant men. When I told James about my views of Jesus’ defense of the Law, however, he disagreed with my opinion that Jesus meant his defense of the Ten Commandments, not all those social and dietary laws added after Moses’ time. Because of his background as a scribe, the gulf between the old tradition and Jesus’ message was difficult to cross. Most of his expectations for converts regarding dietary and social laws hadn’t changed. Though Jesus cared not a wit about these minor laws, his own expectations for converts, when they accepted the simplicity of the Way, was actually more severe. It wasn’t enough not to commit murder, adultery, or any other commandment laid down by Moses. If you dwelled upon these actions, you have committed them in your heart. Jesus’ view on marriage was also in great contradiction to tradition. Jewish law allowed for a man to divorce his wife, but it was impossible for a woman to divorce a man, and yet Jesus’ view on divorce, which was much stricter than tradition, made it possible to divorce only for sexual immorality—for both men and women.

As I write down these words, I realize that most of what Jesus said to the multitude wasn’t new to his thinking. Yet the sermon was, in Latin terms, his magnum opus. The disciples, who hadn’t known Jesus as James and I, saw it as a new dimension to him. In the words of Matthew, who would one day record Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, Jesus had proved he was the Messiah. It was his finest hour.

But Jesus success, many of us feared, had a downside to it. There were, we were told, five thousand people in his audience. The fishermen worried that we would have to baptize many of them. Matthew, Simon, Thomas, Judas, Bartholomew, James, and I discussed this amongst ourselves and agreed that doing the ritual for such a number would be staggering, in fact impossible. It would take days to process that many people. Despite our attempt at being optimistic, though, we knew that Jesus was unpredictable. Because of the constant revelations in his mind, there was no telling what he might do. As he took a breather and chatted with us a few moments, I felt compelled to bring up the subject. He laughed and slapped my shoulder. To everyone’s relief, he reminded us of those times when he preached and no one was given the ritual or baptized.

“My purpose today,” he explained thoughtfully, “was to spread the word—this time in sayings, not ritual. There are too many listeners and, in the future, there will be too many listeners for ritual and baptism. Except for when I send you out in twos, that’s in the past.”

“Send us out!?” Simon, Matthew, and Thomas muttered in dismay.

“You didn’t know that?” John looked at them in disbelief.

“No,” Thomas’ voice trembled, “When are we doing that?”

“Soon,” Philip smiled with mirth. “We’re going out—sheep among the wolves.”

“Uh-uh.” Simon shook his head. “I’m not a speaker, I’m a doer.”

“That goes for me!” Judas folded his arms.

“Me too.” Matthew frowned. “I was a tax collector, not a preacher. I got enemies out there!”

“Well, you’re preachers now!” Peter wagged a finger at them. “What do you think Jesus has been preparing you for?”

“I dunno.” Simon scratched his head, “I thought we just assisted him. We’re really going out on our own?”

“No, in twos,” Peter grew irritated. “You should pay attention Simon. You also Matthew and Judas. Why would Jesus be training us if he didn’t want us to share the load. You’re his apprentices!”

“Is that what we are?” Matthew grumbled. “I thought we were disciples.”

“I can’t do it,” Thomas shook his head. “I chatter like a magpie at times, but I can’t preach.”

“Oh, the preaching is easy,” Simon shrugged. “It’s those baptisms I worry about.”

“I don’t understand,” Judas looked around the group. “I thought Jesus did all that stuff? I’m new here. I’m not prepared for this!”

“Judas came late,” Jesus entered the conversation, “he hasn’t gotten the word. Have faith Matthew and Simon. As I’ve said before, take one day at a time. Your all going to do just fine!”

For the time being the subject was put to rest. Though Peter tried to put a good face on it, we dreaded going out on our own. Despite this concern, the grandeur of today overshadowed our doubts as we looked out at the crowd. For the Shepherd, whose audience was now in the thousands, there were more immediate concerns. Fortunately, we didn’t have to look for the representatives of this gathering. We couldn’t find Uzziah and his friends, whom Jesus suspected were spies, but representatives from different cities soon arrived to congratulate Jesus on his stirring speech. Though no mention was made of how many of their countrymen felt about his sermon, Jesus was quite satisfied. As important to Jesus was the question of whether the crowd had brought food. The representatives, whose enthusiasm had encouraged the people to travel so far, were unclear on this matter. Jesus asked them to find out if there was enough food to hold them over until they returned home.

Peter, who shared our opinion on the subject, suggested we go back to his house before Jesus was stuck performing an endless line of cures, but Jesus dallied, answering questions and explaining his message to listeners. I noticed that the vast majority of people were polite. In fact, as Jesus chatted with his disciples and then talked to the representatives, those nearest to the speaker waited patiently for their turn. We had plenty of time to slip away. Unfortunately, Jesus had waited too long. Finally, after standing back in awe of the miracle worker, the crowd saw their chance, and we were suddenly mobbed. Several sick, maimed, and blind men and women appeared in this group. With them, came a pair of idlers who simply wanted to put Jesus to the test.

“Rabbi! Rabbi!” voices called out, explaining in detail their ailments.

One fellow, dressed like a scribe, asked Jesus if he did this in the name of Beelzebub or God.

Jesus ignored the scribe and a second request that he turn a container of water into wine. Word had evidently gotten out about the wedding in Cana where Jesus performed this miracle. What might have been worrisome was the scribe who challenged Jesus. Fortunately for him this time, the crowd was in no mood for such interruptions. A burly fellow who had tenderly carried his sick wife to Jesus for a cure threatened to break the man’s nose. Several men and women in line cheered him, a few making similar threats. If there were Pharisees, scribes, or temple agents in the crowd, they must have gotten the word, because there were no more challenges today.

Greatly perturbed nevertheless by the line of supplicants, we waited as Jesus performed his cures. Making important exceptions, after telling us he would leave this business to us, Jesus took this opportunity to make converts for the Way. This delayed matters that much more. That hour, as quickly as possible, he gave the rites after curing a blind woman, a man with a cough, a deaf mute child, a man who injured himself fixing his roof, three crippled youths, and a palsied old man. Then, after a mixture of ailments I can scarcely explain, a leper appeared scattering everyone, including his disciples to the foot of the hill.

“That’s awful!” Philip shuddered. “He has no nose. He barely has a face.”

“He smells too,” Matthew made a face.

“He’a a typical leper.” Andrew summarized. “Sores all over, clothes in tatters, his body eaten away.”

“That poor wretched fellow.” I shuddered. “What sin did he do for that?”

“None.” James said thoughtfully. “Good men suffer too. Remember Justus, whom Jesus cured? Look at Job, who was tested by God.”

“That’s true.” I gave him a look of respect. “God allows misfortune to come to both sinners and saved.”

“Humph!” Judas shook his head. “Why would God give someone leprosy?”

“He works in mysterious ways,” Bartholomew offered, stroking his beard.

“Right.” Tobin nodded in agreement. “Look what happened to me.”

“That’s right.” Judas snapped his fingers. “I heard about you, Tobin. You’re one of the shepherds who visited him in the manger.”

“He was in a bad state when we found him.” Bartholomew gave him a pat.

“That’s a prime example of God’s capriciousness.” James sighed. “We mustn’t question Him, though. His purpose is inscrutable. He’s unknowable. Jesus is his interpreter: the voice of God.”

“Exactly,” I exclaimed, “that’s what he is, James—the voice of God.”

“It’s true,” Judas mulled over the idea, “Jesus is his voice, but why is there so much death and disease. Why would a merciful God allow that?”

“Through Jesus, God is merciful,” the words poured out of my mouth.

“Really?” Mary’s voice intruded. “Why would he allow our people to be persecuted? Why are temple agents against Jesus now?”

I had almost said it. If Jesus spoke for God, I couldn’t help wondering, what did that make him? More important to the group that moment, however, were Mary’s questions. Peter, who had been talking to Andrew, looked over at her, shaking his head. “Now, now, Mary, we don’t question God.”

“It’s a fair question,” Simon raised an eyebrow. “I’ve often asked it myself: ‘Why is God cruel?’ Why, for that matter, does He let those bloodsucking priests fleece our people.”

James bristled but said nothing. Peter and the other disciples now joined our conversation.

“That’s a strange thing for a temple agent to say,” John teased.

“Yeah,” drawled his brother, “once you were in the pay of those bloodsucking priests.”

“I’m one of you now.” Simon glared at the brothers. “Why can’t you two accept me. If I had still been a spy, I’d have the goods on Jesus by now. He’s challenged the temple, our tradition, and everything I believed in, but I’m here to stay. There’s no where I’d rather be!”

“Simon, Simon,” Bartholomew, hobbled over, his voice thin with fatigue, “they’re just joking. They poke fun at me too. We all have questions. Jesus is here to answer them!”

“Well,” Judas announced airily, “we don’t have to worry anymore. The Messiah’s come—the voice of God. He’ll answer our questions. Our enemies don’t stand a chance!”

If we hadn’t been so tired and focused on the moment, Judas exclamation would have troubled us. Though that title had been used repeatedly for Jesus, it should be clear by now that he wasn’t the Messiah spoken of by the prophets who would sweep away our conquerors. No one else in our group, except Judas, saw Jesus in that light. Turning our attention completely to Jesus and the leper then, we returned to this discussion.

“What could Jesus be saying to that man?” Philip complained. “Why hasn’t he given him the cure?”

“Yeah,” Andrew studied the scene. “…Why was it taking so long? Jesus did the others quickly. He’s exhausted and needs a rest. What was so special about him?

“Well, one thing for sure.” Peter said, looking down at the crowd. “That leper shooed them away. There are all manner of diseased and crippled people out there. Jesus can’t cure them all.”

“Just how contagious is leprosy?” Thomas gave me a worried look. “He brushed passed me as I stood there.”

“Don’t worry, Thomas,” I said reassuringly. “Jesus told me that leprosy is hard to catch. A person has to be in poor shape and share the same bowl or mug with someone. It’s not like the fever or plague.”

“What’s the big deal?” waved Simon. “We have Jesus. If you catch it, he’ll cure it. I

sort’ve feel invincible with him. He’s like a shield against the world.”

“Yeah,” Judas savored the idea, “I like that—invincible, a shield. Jesus has great power! In a sense, we’re indestructible!”

“We won’t be when we sends out to preach,” Thomas sighed.

Reminded of this prospect, we lapsed into silence. I could scarcely imagine myself preaching to a crowd. I couldn’t imagine any of us as preachers, especially the bumbling Thomas or pugnacious Simon. In what must be considered another important cure for Jesus’ record, he performed the rite, the action of sprinkling him with Peter’s water skin apparently washing away his disease. We could hear the audience below ooh and awe. When we finally saw Jesus and his patient turn toward us after this, it must have been over, but, because of the hood over the man’s head, we couldn’t be sure. As they began walking toward us, we waited with bated breath. The person he cured this time had, after all, been a ruined shell. As Judas said that moment, “If he could fix him, he could fix anything, anyone, anytime!” Judas had become a great enthusiast of Jesus, but he failed to understand who he was. The sun shone on Jesus brown hair those moments, giving him that halo-effect. His eyes flashed like sapphires. The onetime wreck of a man, whom he introduced immediately as Thaddeus, was a brand new person. John and his brother James’ father was named Thaddeus too. This name was also significant to me because I was called that during my travels. My Roman friends thought Jude sounded too Jewish, and yet I was addressed as Thaddeus Judaicus at times. As I stared at this transformed man, remembering this trivia, I was reminded of the fair-haired Britons that joined our band. This man was even fairer. He was obviously not a Jew, but a Gentile. Because Jesus had cured a Gentile before, we weren’t surprised. What surprised us was his countenance, which made him appear as an angelic figure emerging in our midst. His hair was blond, his skin almost milk white, and he had, like Jesus, piercing blue eyes. Jesus had given him a new set of clothes too: a white tunic, white sash, and white robe, a combination he sometimes wore himself. Greatly moved by what we saw (especially me), we had to be prodded to give our names. As Jesus pointed his finger at us, we sounded off one-by-one. Of our group, Judas was the only one to maintain his wits, when Jesus finally came to him.

“Judas Iscariot,” he piped. “Jesus,” he turned to him then, “that was incredible. He looks like he just stepped off a cloud.”

Jesus ignored the compliment, replying quickly, “Thaddeus and Tobin will be a part of the Seventy. They will remain in Capernaum, with Mary Magdalene and Peter’s family. The remainder of the people cured today will also join the Seventy. After you disciples go out, I have big plans for them. We will, as Simon might say, have an army of agents for the Lord.”

“What about the multitude?” Peter motioned. “Are they going home?”

“In the morning,” Jesus heaved sigh. “They want me to speak again.” “I know men.” He glanced around at us. “Many of them are here for the show. They want miracles more than words. But I saw illumination in many of them. It shouldn’t take miracles to believe, but I saw true conviction in those I cured. This time, all of the cured, will serve the Lord. As the word spreads, our army will grow. The islands of converts in various cities and towns will themselves become missionaries. Today was another milestone—the greatest so far. Have patience with the masses. If only a small portion of them are saved and, in turn, save others, it will one day reach the corners of the empire. The entire world will know the truth!”

There was that word again: truth. Jesus was, I understood dimly, the truth. His destiny

seemed awe-inspiring but overwhelming. Though fearful, we were also excited to be in the army of Jesus, on the edge of a wave sweeping the earth. Only Judas frowned that moment. “The Empire? The world,” I heard him mutter, “I thought he came for the Jews!”

******

We weren’t happy that the crowds had lingered. We were used to smaller groups and moving from town to town as Jesus spread the word. Now, they were coming to us, and they wanted him to make another appearance. Jesus was more exhausted than he had ever been before. Peter had voiced our concerns about this several times, but it was no use. He wouldn’t disappoint the crowds. In spite of his optimism, he was worried about peoples attitudes: most of them wanted miracles. He was, more immediately, worried about the welfare of the multitude. They would have to camp overnight in the hills. Even though they were near Lake Gennesaret, it was doubtful if they had the means or know-how to fish. Judging by the response given to him by their representatives, they had little to eat. But Jesus, though a miracle worker, was still a man… He was bone weary and needed to get away from the crowd.

“Come back to the house,” Peter coaxed him. “Esther will fix you something special.”

Esther nodded wearily, but Dinah shook her head in disbelief. “Just whip something up, eh?” I heard her grumble under her breath. “Why doesn’t Jesus use his powers to whip something up!” Considering the chaos his presence caused, I couldn’t blame her for what she said. I’m glad Jesus and the other disciples hadn’t heard her remark, but the truth was, as we entered the main room, the house was a shambles after the damage done to the roof, and the women were exhausted themselves. Mary was quick with her input, too, suggesting the same thing as Dinah, but in a positive spirit. Jesus looked at her tolerantly, replying wearily, “I don’t use God’s power frivolously.” I doubt Mary knew what the word frivolously meant, but I knew she wasn’t stupid. Someday, I told myself, she would surprise us. For now, I comforted her quietly as the disciples plopped down in various corner of the room: “Your heart is pure, Mary.” I said discreetly. “Jesus knows this. Don’t ever change!”

Mary smiled warmly at me. Had I been the man I was before—the adventurer and scamp, I would have done everything in my power to have this woman… But I wasn’t that selfish man nor was Mary the person she was before. As we glanced at each other, while Esther, Dinah, and Bernice entered the kitchen for the purpose of making us supper, I sensed greatness in her. It wasn’t in her beauty, words, or girlish manners, but in the simple fact, Jesus had transformed her, as he had Thaddeus. He had a purpose for her far beyond a helpmate for Peter’s wife and mother-in-law or mere convert of the Way. What it was I didn’t know then, but there was no one, except perhaps Jesus own mother, who would love him more. I had decided almost immediately, after the miracle that made her who she was, to be her friend. Though John, Judas, and I looked at her lustfully at times, the other disciples thought of her as ‘that ex-prostitute,’ as they looked upon Matthew as that “ex-tax gatherer,’ and Simon as that ‘ex-temple spy.’ The fishermen were slow to accept outsiders. Now, I felt the urge to be her protector against their criticism. In this noble enterprise, I competed with both Judas and John.

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